Tatort

Schimanski is the man. In the beginning of this episode he is scolded by his boss about messing something up, so he goes to his favorite pub and drinks himself to stupor. At that moment, he gets a call that there’s going to be a raid in his favorite brothel. So he heads there, and then chases after some snitch down an incredibly lively night street. He catches him, drunk drives him to some street stall and buys him a sausage in exchange for information. At this moment, he and his partner break into a toy store without permission and start an investigation. After such an entrance, I was shocked like a nun fresh out of convent who met Schimanski for the first time. I had no idea what the hell was going on, I just stared at the screen slack-jawed and watched the police chief move Schimanski’s desk somewhere in the closet to catch a break from him. Schimanski manages to grab some kind of board game on his way there, so that it doesn’t fall into the chief’s hands. This is followed by a mix of crazy drinking scenes, where the best one is that of Schimanski and Hollai partying hard in a pub while listening to some crazy German punk. That was a wild ride indeed. Then I started to get lost in the story because my eyelids were beginning to droop. I was awake to see the ending, but I didn’t get it all. Anyhow, I’m rating this with three stars not for this particular case, but for Schimanski’s character. I don’t think you could find a second cop like him. Especially one that would, like him, replace the gun behind his belt with a bottle opener. That’s really something else. (15.01.2015)

As much as the previous episode was dripping with liquor, whores and punk, this one was rather quiet. Schimanski doesn’t reek of a whorehouse and what’s more, he’s actually investigating some case. And that’s quite an improvement over the previous episode. It’s not exactly what I would want to watch at 10 PM on a Wednesday night, but on the other hand it’s a proper crime movie, one of the most decent ones that the Germans have to offer. Anyway, the paintings of the industrial factory on Kissling’s office walls once again didn’t disappoint. (22.01.2015)

So Schimanski is returning home after a tiring shift. Let’s put aside whether he actually caught someone or drank a six-pack. There’s a crying girl at his doorstep, so Schimanski has to take her into his apartment to protect her, because her mom has disappeared. On the next day, a dead body is discovered by the favorite Duisburg factory and everything becomes clear. The investigation starts. It’s once again a good crime film, but it lacks the rough charm of Schimanski’s drunkard self. He’s the good guy here. The girl he starts to care for is trying her best to seduce him, but he’s resisting. And because there are not many pubs, beers or whores, you can only guess at the ending. (31.01.2015)

In this case, Schimanski has a huge mission: to save the German nation from typhus. Sometimes he catches a break with a whore or two, but most of the time he focuses on the case. So we get a proper crime flick with everything it entails. Without booze, dumb talking and with prostitutes who are able to provide a helping hand in the best way they can in crucial moments. (06.02.2015)

Schimanski was holding himself back in this episode, both in terms of drinking and womanizing. His only solace is the attractive Miriam who gets entangled in a murder and clearly knows something more than Schimanski and Thanner. Thanner, on the other hand, is drinking like a fish because he’s having marital trouble, finding refuge in Schimanski’s apartment. Unfortunately, the well-paced drinking party and the case that was off to an interesting start fizzle out into some quite weird scenes that move the investigation onto quite an absurd level. The cherry on top goes to Schimanski and Thanner’s colleague, who’s following Miriam but unable to describe her location – it takes him ages to just find the right word for a locker she’s leaning against. He, however, has no problem to eat half of the candy store next to which he’s patrolling. This is followed by what might be the dumbest ambush I’ve ever seen. There’s shooting from a car and their colleague is hit. Then Schimanski arrives on the scene in his own vehicle, dodges the attackers’ car, does not follow them at all and goes to see his injured colleague instead. Meanwhile, the attackers ride away to God knows where… It’s kind of hard to describe but you’d be hard pressed to imagine a scene more idiotic than that. It seems to have been written by the drunk Thanner, who was showing off quite a lot in this episode. (14.02.2015)

This movie is one of the best episodes from the Schimanski saga. It’s dominated by the fact that the fans of the soccer team MSV Duisburg have the main roles. This movie starts with a brutal soccer match where the fans are causing such a riot that even Sparta or Barcelona fans could learn a thing or two from them. But as soon as the match ends, which is a wonder in itself, groups of people start to leave their seats and a cadaver gets left behind one of them. Since Schimi was there at the match, he immediately starts investigating. But it wouldn’t be Schimi if he wasn’t investigating in his own way. He picks out a group of delinquents, buys them some beers and drinks with them to infiltrate into their environment. But they get him so drunk that they find out he’s a cop and so they take him out, take off his clothes and throw him in the middle of the stadium where his partner Tanner finds him. From then on, one thing leads to another and the murderer is quite a surprise. However, the 80 minutes were amazing to watch and apart from the booze and a good plot twist, there were some amazing lines exchanged between Schimi and Tanner who was unusually rough given the situations he keeps finding himself in. (05.03.2015)

A rather sweaty episode with dialogues along the lines of: “Constable, could you please pay attention to the car crash? After all, the dead guy is completely dead!” It only gets better when Tanner describes the situation to Schimanski: “The dead guy’s over here. It was a drive-by shooting… in his legs.” And Schimi answers: “In his legs? And that killed him?” At that point, a pseudo-investigation starts and Tanner finally tries out his womanizer techniques. Schimi’s drinking for a change and then a new boss, as fat as a whale, scoots in between them. The entire investigation doesn’t make any sense and the only upsides are the moments when they’re not investigating. This one was quite weak. (09.03.2015)

This is one of the episodes where Schimanski shows off in all his glory. The investigation is – per usual – brutally schizophrenic and so we need to focus on particular scenes. Ordering a curry sausage at the murder scene, a high Dutchman in the suspect’s apartment, a ton of empty beers in all possible places and one solid disco dance after which Schimi showcases the perfect card play. Add in some solid car chases that are dominated by a wet road and a ton of spectacular drifts that will never let you figure out where anyone is going. Oh, and there’s a cult which is one big chaos with a Chinese person who teaches martial arts to the cult members and keeps on shouting “Fight for Peace”. But yeah, this episode was a good one. (12.03.2015)

This episode of Schimanski might be one of the first ones I’ve seen and wrote a review on. But my review was so average and nondescript that I had to erase it, watch the movie again and then put some elbow grease into it. Because this isn’t just any ordinary movie. Schimi crawls into a pub where he orders beer and some chick who needs help clings onto him. She wants to get him to her villa where she thinks something strange is afoot and Schimi is supposed to investigate it. On their way there, they stop at a convenience store where Schimi asks for two beers and gets two four-packs, which made me confused about how much beer he means by “one”. But then we get some intense suspense when they get surrounded by a group of bastards who don’t want Schimi to make it to court and testify against one of them. If it weren’t for some of the absolutely insane scenes like the failed attempt at an escape on a motorcycle, I’d rate it four stars. But that scene where Schimi takes out a garage door with his motorcycle really did it for me. My girlfriend even said that it was worse than an ordinary soap opera. That was a bit of an exaggeration, but on the other hand, I can’t say that I didn’t laugh at moments when I wasn’t supposed to laugh. (28.03.2015)

In my opinion, this was the most legendary episode yet. “Midnight Lady” in full swing, offending black people, the final fist-throwing, falling into a puddle and busting a brothel where Schimanski’s getting recognized by one fat chick next to another. In the meantime, there’s also the kidnapping of Schimi’s girlfriend’s son. This movie might even be a rare exception where Schimi keeps a single woman longer than for a half an hour in his bed. Der Tauschis an absolute classic, I could watch it all day long and it would never get old. Tanner’s disco dancing with a mustache so long that he could take off ladies’ panties with it put the cherry on top of all this. A legendary movie. (02.04.2015)

Since I’ve spent a good amount of time watching Horst Schimanski’s cases, I must say that Freunde is a truly well-done crime investigation movie that had absolutely everything that a good crime investigation should have. Most of all, it draws a lot of inspiration from the French era of Delon’s, Bebel’s or Lino Ventura’s reign. But it’s not important that this particular movie is similar to these French legends, it’s important that Horst Schimanski is still his good old self and that there’s an incredibly high-quality story as well. When it comes to this movie, it’d be a shame to describe the individual scenes like with the previous episodes. In any case, the moments when Schimi has a brutal fight with Tanner or when he sinks to the very bottom are flawless. The ending simply must convince anyone that this movie’s quality is on a whole different level. (17.04.2015)

A model five-star case for Schimanski. It has everything including wit and quality investigation. The sluts were left out by the screenwriters this time, but it doesn’t matter at all. The first day of Schimanskiʼs holiday is absolutely exemplary. First, he sets up a tent by a lake and gets scolded by a local farmer who says it is his land and he has no business being there. Then a horse gets startled by the shore and it throws a girl off into the water. He saves her and the girl gives him a dressing-down because he has no business touching her. Eventually, a local warden with a German Shepherd approaches him. He scolds him and says that he cannot fish without a fishing license and the dog eats his salami with cheese. The scene where Schimanski jumps headfirst into the lake in nature’s garb through reed or the one where he opens his fridge full of beers and pickled cucumbers in his flooded apartment is also unforgettable. However, the investigation is also very interesting and revolves around local farmers and banned animal antibiotics. Therefore, what we were dealing with a couple of years ago, the Germans made use of in the screenplay for Schimanski already in 1991. In my view, it’s good and a clear five-starer. (02.08.2017)