Los mercenarios 2

«¡Mi zapato es más grande que este coche!» :-D Arnold es Ed Wood entre los actores de Hollywood. Dudo mucho que este año alguna película me pueda deleitar más o llenar con más testosterona que Los Mercenarios 2. Una película de clase B con efectos digitales baratos, frases geniales y alusiones de género. Y que JCVD ​actúe mejor que los demás e interprete al mejor personaje, eso es algo histórico. (04.11.2012)

A bad joke. I didn’t expect to like Expendables II very much, I’m not the target audience of the genre of soulless, old-fashioned action films after all, but that I wouldn’t like it even as a well made, undemanding pop-corn flick, was a surprise, especially after the very positive responses. The biggest problem is in the action. To begin with, there’s very little of it, and it’s not even good. Many people praise the fact that this time the camera is not epileptic and the editing is not like a video clip, but instead of that we have long clear shots, when the whole lot is actually not clear at all. West works clumsily with the space, it’s not clear who is escaping whence and whither, who is following whom and where they are shooting at… All the action (with the exception of the opening scene, where this doesn’t fully apply) is basically a tiring montage of someone running and shooting, without any dynamics that would pull the viewer into the plot. And the script, if we can call it that, it’s awful. I know that only an idiot could expect sophistication from a film like this, but this is already too much! The characters move without any concept somewhere in the huge expanses of the former Soviet Union, they amusingly run into each other, and when the heroes are in deep trouble, SOMEONE comes, saves everyone, and then leaves. And they frame it with crap like “Jeez, thanks for stopping by”. Like, what the fuck? There are only about six good jokes and one-liners, and half of them are directed at Lundgren. Expendables II is a product with a short shelf-life (this certainly won’t be a cult movie) that gets good reviews from the fanboys thanks to the same model that makes teenage girls wet with Twilight and Potter-fans love the last Potter films – they can watch their favourite stars doing something on the screen, regardless of what, how and why it’s done. But that’s not enough to make a good film, quite the opposite, actually. Two stars, and I don’t even know what for, maybe for the professional look and the nice dose of light-heartedness here and there. Otherwise, crap. (07.09.2012)

Objectively, with a runtime of under two hours, you just can't give all the characters the space they undoubtedly deserve. Beyond that, it’s a pure action spectacle that works exactly as I wanted it to because it doesn’t underestimate fan intelligence - this is the only way to get the action going, which is secondary because the primary thing is to ride the wave of catchphrases that beat into the mummified icons of most of the people involved. (12.09.2012)

It's not less that a good old classic. A group of retirees travel to digitally modified Bulgaria, alternating game maps that reflect the nostalgic-archetypal touch of the genre, and here and there we have deus ex machina, greeted by a volley of insider jokes. The banality of the plot as well as the parody touch of space and characters add post-modern qualities to it, while Simon West also adds clear personal qualities and a solid tempo. Fortunately, Stallone already understood that some seriousness or "realistic" motivation had no place here - nostalgics wanted their messages and more winks. Blunt warrior macho sentiment still abounds, but this time it's filler between great comedic performances and cutting action with much better timing than in the first film. Although it is again "only" an action encyclopedia, this time it is richly illustrated and has even more bloated references to the mythology of the wheezy grandfathers. I had a great time. (27.08.2012)

Finally someone understands that nostalgia for action movie style from the eighties with their wall-poster heroes can today function only as tongue in cheek. And precisely because it doesn’t take itself seriously at all, unlike part one, gives this some real oomph. On top of that, the action is easy to follow, not that modern, epileptic style of editing, like in part one. So this time I would definitely consider buying an old, second hand VHS of this with its consecutive monotonous Czech dubbing. (24.12.2012)

The first one collected points mainly for effort and for finally managing to finish. The second one sets a faster pace from the beginning, holds it without stumbling, effectively sells the emotions of tough guys - and only then reveals its main weapons. Personally, I think that even though I really like Slye or Jason, I am certainly not the primary target audience. But just tell that to the final showdown at the airport, which must invigorate the senses of every viewer who has ever enthusiastically cheered on an action film. Whether it's anyone from the most anticipated trio shooting, Jean-Claude delightfully delivering lines or Chuck Norris amusing the viewer with a joke about himself, this reached its climax in the final shot. (12.09.2012)

I have mixed feelings. On one hand, things that I always wanted to see, on the other exaggerated prancing about for female fans and zero story. Arnold’s lines are way off. Norris tells jokes about himself and the whole thing is very forced, and not in a good way. The greatest positive element here is Van Damme who enjoys being evil. Anytime he walks into shot, it’s worth it. In the finale, Sly makes the most of how pissed he was that he didn’t land a role in part one. :-) West’s directing is visually high standard, but in places the action is confusing and very little of it is interesting. Jet Li is gone in an instant, luckily we see more of Dolph. I’m giving this four stars, but purely out of blind fandom. Otherwise, someone deserves a slap for the credits. (13.09.2012)

I understand the general enthusiasm because seeing all those legends together has a unique feeling. Unfortunately, when I take into account that a film has qualities and attributes other than the cast and the chemistry between the actors (which would exist even if they just looked at each other), it is a failure overall. Simon West seems to have forgotten what a quality action film should be like. I'll overlook the terrible television picture quality (retro and all) and the locations somewhere between Romania and Bulgaria (hello Van Damme and Seagal). If The Expendables had action as good as Con Air had 15 years ago, I would be thrilled, but unfortunately, it’s not even half as good. The editing very confusing, nobody knows who is shooting whom, there are several repeated shots within a few minutes, and woefully confusing fights, except for the last one. I wouldn't expect a purely action film to have its biggest weakness precisely in the action. Stallone is still a cool and the lines and jokes are fine, but I would rather watch three of each guy's best films and not have to look at such a mess. (17.09.2012)

With the passing of a few weeks, I cooled off and took a star off. I really liked the first film better, I expected more room for Arnold Schwarzenegger, some of the lines felt forced, the plot slowed down unexpectedly after the bombastic beginning and Chuck Norris appeared in The Expendables 2 probably mainly to prove to the non-believers that he is real and not imaginary... But the stunning finale gave me absolutely everything I wanted. (11.10.2012)

Much more polished than the rather dull first instalment, mainly because the script relies more on lightness and instead of conforming to standard action tropes, it turns them into a big joke. Although most of the credit goes to the protagonists themselves, who embody their career alter egos with admirable verve and insight (Norris's crazy cameo reigns supreme), and the story is downright slapdash when it comes to some dialogue and personal levels, the action is so good and well-paced and the villains, led by the cold-blooded JCVD, are so hilarious that you simply won't be bored. This time, satisfaction. (05.08.2018)

You can easily shake your head at the rating I gave this movie, but this is simply a film that knocked me out in the cinema. I enjoyed it, laughed, and experienced the action scenes, which are fantastic and also maintain the right level of bloodiness, despite the rumors that Chuck Norris only wants to play in movies that are suitable for young audiences. I admit that it would have been enough for me if the names that appeared in the film were just there, and I would have gone to see it without a second thought. I wouldn't have bothered. But the film "Expendables: The Expendables" made it clear to me that these movies are entertaining. The sequel definitely did not disappoint. You just have to look at those names: Sylvester Stallone, Jason Statham, Jet Li (although he had very little screen time), Dolph Lundgren, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Bruce Willis, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Terry Crews, Randy Couture, and of course, the greatest of the greatest, Chuck Norris. This is simply a cast that takes your breath away. There has never been a meeting of so many action stars. I almost feel like it will never happen again. Stallone and the other screenwriters wrote a film that plays with the classic B-grade action films of the 80s and all their clichés, but also plays with the actors themselves. The stars here make fun of each other, and even one of the jokes about how unbeatable Chuck Norris is is heard. It's a wonderful excursion into a world you know, but it's still new. This is not a museum, but a proper action ride, where it works with both the old guard and the "newcomers". Statham seems to fit perfectly with the veterans. The film doesn't have a great story, there are no perfect characters, and objectively, you could even criticize the action scenes, which are relatively few, but that doesn't change the fact that I had an incredible experience in the cinema, which I would gladly repeat sometime. If you want art, don't go to "The Expendables". If you long for entertainment that will make you laugh and pump a little adrenaline, go see this movie. If you love old action films, you will love this new one as well. More: http://www.filmovy-denik.cz/2012/09/expendables-2-cerna-venuse-mame-papeze.html (28.02.2013)

It's not a great action flick, but I have to be extremely grateful that this film with the biggest action stars of the last century was made. At the very least, the scenes with Arnold ripping the door off the Smart and the arrival of Chuck Norris will stay with me forever. (28.10.2012)