Machete

La estrella de Machete no es Danny Trejo - el Machete, y ni siquiera Danny Trejo - el jardinero :-) El tipo, aunque no permito que se hable mal de él por ser una leyenda de culto de un subgénero, simplemente no sabe actuar, solo sabe hacer caras. La estrella de Machete es el numeroso grupo de villanos interpretados por hombres atractivos, entre los que cada espectador encontrará a «su» hijo de puta. Para mí, es Don Johnson escondido detrás de las grandes gafas de sol. Incluso Seagal goza de su papel a sus anchas. Es que el año 2010 es el año cinematográfico de los buenos y viejos héroes de acción, ahora desvanecidos... Rodríguez tomó su «flick» Machete en un estilo orgásmico y probablemente recordaremos más escenas de él que de Planet Terror. Pero le faltan diálogos destacables con potencial de convertirse en culto, y también le falta la presencia de otro personaje loco con cara de gran señor, Q.T.. (02.10.2010)

–Cuban? –Mexican. It’s such a shame that Rodriguez didn’t have the balls to shoot the whole of his Mexploitation flick as crudely as he filmed the über-muthafucka prologue... I found that regrettable until the scene with entrails. The film’s superficial refinement only draws attention away from the self-confident (and self-conscious, as evidenced by the involvement of the uncensored internet) contempt for common sense, good taste and every conceivable kind of political correctness. Machete is an exploitation movie for multiplexes, but that doesn’t mean that it would lack machetes, machine guns, boobs, gore, sexy nurses, a murderous nun, a one-eyed avenger, Steven Seagal, Tom Savini and a  pissed-off Mexican with a weed whacker. You can either accept this film in all its simplicity and bombast and enjoy the ruthless fun, or look for a more sophisticated view of the world. This time, I’m giving a strong four-start rating and posing a simple question: why always complicate things? 85% (18.11.2013)

So, that little grindhouse flick that was shadowed by Stallone’s The Expendables turned out to be something completely outrageous that knows no limits. A perfect dose of trash and self-awareness. Trejo! Seagal! Alba! De Niro! Fahey! Lohan! Rodriguez! Rodriguez! While The Expendables fool around… (27.09.2010)

They should have stuck with the fake trailer. It serves up imaginative action and catchphrases in every other scene, but the whole thing is kind of... sterile. And boring at that. Lost among the geysers of stylishness is a plot that needed to draw us in more and give us more insight into the characters. I know, it’s all about a slightly different genre and intelligence rules, but even when you have one of the ugliest people running around between Hollywood and Mexico in the lead role, you expect the fun to be a little more serious, or conversely, a little crazier. Like Planet Terror. (29.09.2010)

With similarly tuned retro images, it is difficult to find a reasonable line between piety, parody and seriousness, if I paraphrase the words of one of the protagonists: Machete didn't cross the line, the line crossed Machete. This film is the most entertaining and dullest spectacle I can imagine in the genre. If I’d had it on VHS in the 1980s, I’d undoubtedly have long hair, a black mustache and a sharpened machete. And a girl with one eye. [85%] (10.09.2010)

Some really hot chicks, some charismatic dudes, and a perfect Robert Rodriguez to boot... awesome "gore" and a surprisingly good plot. It was sexy, it had juice...again, again, again! (18.11.2010)

Machete is one of those action movies that do not provoke or offend me, but honestly speaking, they don't particularly impress me either. The exaggeration is to blame for the former, which is likable and allows me to forgive the traditional shallowness of the action movie script. As for the latter, it's due to the stereotype, because Rodriguez keeps filming the same thing over and over again, and I admit that he earned most of my sympathy with his amateur debut made for a few hundred dollars. Moreover, casting someone like Danny Trejo in the lead role is more than daring, because he is a strictly typecast actor who can handle small roles, but fails miserably when it comes to delivering something substantial in a big ensemble. The script is traditionally shallow and simply exploits the established action clichés, beautiful girls, cynical killers, and a bulletproof action hero. It has all been done a thousand times before. Overall impression: 50%. (08.03.2011)

Danny Trejo! Rodriguez lives up to expectations to a tee. Blood, guts, Jessica Alba in the shower, one liners, Lindsay Lohan in a pool, machetes... And Seagal probably has never been this cool. (20.10.2010)

Crazy, wacky, and very stylish, as it’s usual with Robert Rodríguez. A film purely for die-hard fans, eternal optimists and junkies. (23.07.2011)

One question: Why isn't Tarantino in Machete? Now to the film. If I have to compare it to Planet Terror, Rodriguez's first grindhouse is better. Unfortunately, there is nothing in Machete that I didn't expect. Chopped off hands, gallons of blood, pretty to beautiful women and girls, their exposed breasts, the word "fuck" used so many times you can't even count them, jumping out of a window by your intestines... It's pleasantly wacky and crazy. But it's not original anymore, and it lacks juicy dialogue. Danny Trejo, of course, shoots, stabs, cuts with a machete and a wheedwhacker, Robert De Niro and Steven Seagal perform the same function as Bruce Willis in Planet Terror... But it's boring and not funny. (22.10.2010)

Typical Rodriguez: self-absorbed, wallowing in unnecessary perversions at the expense of a better developed story and the characters themselves, who under his baton are nothing but necessary figures without a sense of humour and exaggeration. And neither Danny Trejo's rugged expression, who is only in the film anyway because of his sharp machetes, nor Robert De Niro's villain, who is at least a pleasant refresher in Rodriguez's absurd world without boundaries, can change things. But it can’t be denied that the film is brutal action entertainment, very funny at times and that Jessica Alba's sexy backside is worth more than a dude hanging by his guts. If it was made by Tarantino, he would certainly have brought the necessary mafia touch to the story and steered it on the right action track, and Machete may have been an unattainable genre gem. As it is, however, it's just a shabbier little brother to Stallone's more stylish and straightforward The Expendables. (03.09.2012)

Del film literalmente emana la emoción de Robert Rodriguez por el tema seleccionado y depende de si esta emoción impacta y también se transfiere al espectador. En mi caso, funcionó casi instantáneamente. Danny Trejo es perfecto para este papel, tal vez incluso parece que Machete fue creado a su imagen y semejanza. El elenco adicional de actores es de primera clase y creo que todos los actores y actrices lo disfrutaron a su manera. Es genial ver la primera parte cuando ya están proyectando la segunda en los cines, se puede combinar de manera agradable. (11.11.2013)

Great B-movie of the exact type that I enjoy. Action-packed, rough, crazy, and with an excellent main character. Great scenes that I can still recall in my mind. It's a shame that Rodriguez sometimes ignores digital tricks and prefers to go the traditional route of classic tricks. It would fit the B-movie quite well, even though it's a modern B-movie. Other than that, I had a great time. (26.02.2014)