Baywatch: Los vigilantes de la playa

Es realmente MUY mala. ¡Qué pena! Aquí nada funciona, y con dos horas (y una incapacidad cada vez mayor de los creadores para mantener todo al menos en un nivel), el final es un gran sufrimiento. Incluso los camellos de Hasselhoff y Pamela no están incorporados con imaginación o humor. ¡Y duran solo unos segundos! (18.06.2017)

Otra memoria de los años noventa: cada sábado en la escuela primaria comenzaba con los Cuentos de Capulina, seguidos de Skippy, Tarzán y Guarda Costas. No era realmente un gran fanático de la serie, pero era imposible no verla o al menos no oír hablar de ella. No vale la pena mencionar a Pamela. La apuesta por la nostalgia de los fanáticos no resultó del todo bien, al menos eso deduje, es un fracaso comercial y los críticos se regocijaron. No esperaba ningún milagro y estoy bastante satisfecho, se puede decir que me divertí bastante, pero una vez que la película comenzó a tomar un poco más en serio, me divertí menos. Dwayne para mí es una elección adecuada para Mitch, Kelly es demasiado linda, estuve pensando durante cinco minutos dónde la había visto, hasta que recordé una escena de Dark Case, hmm :-) (07.09.2017)

When I was a kid, I watched the Baywatch quite a lot. That’s also the reason why I was so curious about the Rock’s and Zac Efron’s performances in the remake. In the end, I must say I’m quite disappointed. The comedy isn’t innovative, it’s not explicit, it’s really not anything in particular. It has its moments, but overall, it’s more stupid than it is funny. Pamela Anderson and David Hasselhoff even make an appearance, but they are so utterly uninteresting that they basically copy the movie’s overall vibe. It was bad. And that’s quite a shame. (27.08.2017)

When the muscular men aren’t diving into the water in slow motion and the beautiful women aren’t emerging from the water in slow motion (the film never rises above the level of how male and female bodies are depicted in subverting gender stereotypes), two or more characters stand/sit on the beach and, in unimaginatively shot scenes, spend a tiresomely long time dragging out an adolescent joke about, for example, the age of Efron’s character (“Where did you come from, One Direction?”) or a sidekick’s inability to form an articulate thought when coming face to face with a person of the opposite sex. As a star vehicle for Dwayne Johnson, this two-hour celebration of virility and heroism based more on physical strength than on intellect works particularly well when it exaggerates the protagonist’s perfection to the edge of deliberate parody. Unfortunately, it does so by repeatedly using the same template, with a laziness that is characteristic of how the whole film is written (piling up supposedly humorous asides instead of developing the joke) and directed (poor timing of the bumbling action scenes). In the second half, which is mostly focused on a rather insipid crime plot (serving mainly as an excuse for The Rock to punch someone in the mouth), the film is not only short on humour (rather, it is unironically affected), but it also runs out of ideas, loses pace and doesn’t have a proper build-up. Among other things, this is due to the fact that the main star disappears from the film for quite a long time, thus taking away the only reason to suffer through this comedy targeted mainly at boys under the age 15 (and apparently written by people of the same age and gender). 40% (15.06.2017)

I can endure a lot. I don't have any particularly nostalgic relationship with the original phenomenon Baywatch, and I always appreciate Priyanka Chopra as a villain. But this film doesn't make sense even in the series of the strange "comedies with Dwayne Johnson" subgenre. There is nothing more here than a bit of humor for tweens and completely botched cameos by David Hasselhoff and Pamela Anderson. (11.08.2023)